Anniversary Gifts: Modern versus Traditional Trends

Gone are the days of giving paper or cotton for a first or second anniversary. With the changing times, the anniversary gift etiquette has changed. As society moves more towards affluence, so do the gifts that define us. Of course, you can always just choose something you deem appropriate, something that is truly thoughtful and from the heart.

Modern anniversary gifts take into account the changing desires of society, especially in terms of when gifts are given. Instead of paper for a first anniversary, the modern gift is a clock. For the second it is china, and for the third it is crystal or glass. This is a move away from supplying things considered essential for the running of a household (paper, cotton, leather).

Rather than the traditional gifts of flowers or fruits, we mark fourth anniversaries with appliances. Fifth anniversaries are now marked with silverware rather than wood. Traditionally, a chair made of wood or even simply firewood was considered an appropriate gift. In modern times, wood figures or antiques are deemed appropriate as sixth anniversary gifts instead of the traditional iron or candy.

With the increasing focus on work, desk sets have become a favorite seventh anniversary gift instead of copper and wool. The tradition of giving pottery or bronze for the eighth anniversary has been replaced by lace and linens, marking our move away from utilitarian tastes to an increased sense of luxury. And instead of gifts made of willow, we now give leather gifts on the ninth anniversary.

More traditional anniversary gifts slowly worked their way up to the trappings of jewelry, not arriving until the 25th anniversary. The more modern take, however, is to mark the 10th anniversary with diamond jewelry. It does not need to be anything extravagant, but the jump to diamonds at the 10th probably speaks to the increase in the divorce rate, it's an accomplishment to stay together for ten years in today's world.

Through the years, modern gifts continue to be more expensive than their traditional counterparts. Fashion jewelry marks the 11th anniversary and pearls mark the 12th (traditionally the 30th). Textiles and furs are gifts for the 13th anniversary, gold jewelry for the 14th and watches for the 15th. Matching "his" and "hers" watches are received by many couples.

Gift giving then skips from the 15th to the 20th anniversary, which is marked with platinum. After the 20th, the modern gifts fall back somewhat in line with the traditional. The traditional and modern gift for the 25th anniversary is the same ie silver, but the 30th anniversary gift in modern times is a diamond instead of the traditional pearl. The last variation is the 35th anniversary, which was traditionally marked by coral and is now commemorated with jade.

For the rest of the anniversary gifts, the modern etiquette has not changed much from the traditional etiquette. We still give ruby for the 40th, sapphire for the 45th, gold for the 50th, emerald for the 55th and diamond for the 60th.

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